Just in Time for V-Day

A few weeks ago I saw this shirt on Casey S on the Bachelor and fell in like. 
I thought it was a pretty cute shirt but I was also in the middle of my "do it yourself, moron" phase (it lasted about 1 week) and thought I'd give it a whirl.
But, just as Casey S put off telling Ben that she was in love with another man, so she could stay on reality TV, I put off updating this post so I could watch reality TV. So hopefully you are either incredibly patient and can wait to wear this next V-Day, or you can find a way to rock a heart t-shirt in March (not that I condone that behavior). 
I made good use of my "who doesn't need 5 3-packs of mean's white t-shirts" phase and cut up on of my shirts. I used a v-neck because it's all I had, but I recommend a crew-neck t; unless you think it is cool to have your neckline so wide that your shirt slips off your shoulders and down your abdomen while you are on the treadmill at the gym. I happened to find that experience very cool so it worked out for everyone. 
What I did was Cut out the neckline (again, maybe not necessary) and cut off the bottom inch-ish hem of the tee. I then cut the hem-circle into fringes and laid it on the front of the shirt in the shape of a heart. 
A few stitches later and voila, I was just like Casey S. ... alone with a heart t-shirt on Valentine's day. Hopefully she also indulged in a Papa Murphy's heart shaped pizza because that was one of the better decisions I've ever made. 


Since this adventure was very spontaneous, I didn't take any pictures. So here is the finished product, after a gym wear and a few washes. 

And if you have $30 laying around and don't want to bother with the cutting and the sewing, here is the link to the actual shirt Casey S. is wearing (thanks to my favorite website, Possessionista). 

DIY scarf.

It's Puppybowl Sunday and, in true Sunday fashion, I have spent all day on the couch in my pjs. While wasting time productively getting inspiration on Pinterest, I came across this little masterpiece of t-shirt scarves. 

I have a couple of t-shirts that have sentimental value, but I'm not much of a t-shirt wearer, and I have to sleep in v-necks because anything touching my throat wakes me up in a fit of panic thinking I'm being choked, so they just sit in my closet waiting to see the light of day.
And this tutorial requires no sewing or discernable skill of any kind, so it was right up my alley. 
Seriously, this project is so simple that I was able to start and finish it with such a lack of energy that I haven't even brushed my teeth yet. 
I have a t-shirt that my dad gave me from the days when he skied across Europe doing the Vasaloppet (which he is currently doing as I write this, at the age of 57. And I am in my pjs at 1:30, at the age of 25...). I really like the sentiment of this shirt, but, as you can see, it's not exceptionally wearable: and it tries to strangle me to death while I sleep. 

 So I suggest watching the video for instructions, but it basically boils down to cutting plate-sized circles out of the shirt, cutting the circles into spirals, and then stretching the circles to make them look like ruffles. I didn't stretch too hard because this shirt, much like myself, had to navigate through the 80s, and it was a little delicate. 

Because I'm a bit sentimental, I cut one circle so I could still see the logo of the shirt

And because I am smelly-breathed, pj'd hot mess, puppy graciously offered to model for me. 

What a handsome fellow. 

What the juice?

A couple of weeks ago I was watching Castle (10/9c on abc) and Ryan and his fiancée were doing a juice "cleanse" for their wedding. For some God unknown reason, I was intrigued by this idea and took to the world-wide-web to see how I could get in on a piece of this action. I found multiple companies that were generously willing to send me juice for a 3-day "cleanse" for the low-low price of $65 a day. Then my obnoxious DIY self said, "just buy a cheap juicer and make the juices yourself!" (she's like the annoying girl in school who knows all the answers and has all these great accessories that she whipped up in 5 minutes from some paperclips and twine; that girl is a a real MacGyver  of useless things). So I found some recipes online and bought a bottom-of-the-line juicer on Amazon for about $30. 

As you can imagine, within the time it took for my juicer to get to me, I had lost all motivation to "cleanse" my system and it took another couple of weeks to get back on that horse. Like many of my other projects, this was at least a month in the making. I finally went to the grocery store and bought all the fresh fruits I needed and thought I'd mix all my juices in one day and then freeze them so for the three day cleanse I would have pre-made juice. 

I don't know if any of you have juiced before, but it was a straight-up disaster. My cheap machine overfilled it's pulp bowl (probably a user-error) so when I'd take it out to dump, piles of pulp would fall out onto my kitchen counter and floor. I was constantly cleaning up spinach from everywhere imaginable, and washing the machine after every fruit/vegetable to keep it from clogging. There were pieces of apple and blueberry shooting out at my face and spinach took up permanent residence in places I didn't even know existed. And to add to the absurdity of the experience, I had put a water dish in the kitchen for puppy because he wouldn't drink from his normal dish (finicky, that one) so every time I would step back in exasperation, I would step into his water dish and spill water/dog spit all over the floor and my socks. 

So my "day of juicing" turned into about three days of madness, and then I had to leave my juices in the freezer for a few days because I was too annoyed with any juice to stomach them (turns out, I was also unable to stomach a spinach/kale/apple/lemon juice). 

And no, I didn't actually make every juice that was presented in the recipe/program. So I had like 3 of 6 juices for each of the three days. Don't worry though, I did buy the $11 coconut oil and agave nectar that is now sitting, unopened in my pantry and mocking me every time I reach for the mac-n-cheese box. 

At 9am on a Friday, I decided to put my best foot forward (the dry one, of course) and semi-committed to cleansing my system with a weekend of spinach and pear remnants. By 11am, I had caved and eaten a kashi breakfast bar (but, it's Kashi, which means it is healthy and doesn't count as actual cheating). By noon I had convinced my self that it would be in my best interest to only drink juices for part of the day, and have an actual dinner. I mean, I didn't want to screw up my metabolism by fasting, and I had some killer chicken-parm leftovers that would go bad if I didn't eat them. Thus, my original half-assed commitment halved again, and now I was at quarter-assed commitment, chocking down these bizarre concoctions until about 5pm Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. 

This wasn't a total waste, however, because I got some killer smoothie recipes, and now I just keep frozen fruit on hand and mix up a healthy snack whenever I feel like it. 

(And if you caught on the my use of "cleanse" with quotations, it's because I believe the word cleanse is just a way of saying fast without sending like an attention starved starlet). 

So my metabolism is intact, I mix smoothies like a master, and I own a juicer so when my fruits and veggies start to go bad because I dont' eat them, I can throw them in the juicer and take them down like a shot, a shot of health. Bingo!